[RECAP]: creativity vs satisfaction


– Recently I found out I am lack of creativity. It seems like I am standing still at my creative side. It hurts when I cannot do anything creatively. I did a sketch for a contest and did not win anything. I feel disappointed because I spent time on it and do something differently to create an interesting composition. So I started doing exercise and tried to stimulate my thought or people say clearing my mind. Well, feel better to get physical but it is just for my body sake, getting healthier or feeling healthier. So how can I make the mind work again? I remember when I was in Atlantic Union College, MA and I had a great time doing art and painting, possibly that was my first time to take paining class. I feel fortunate to have a great teacher at that time, his name is Roger Preston who inspired me in art and appreciating art in varies form. I was very productive as a student at that time, paint and draw a lot. Contrast to now, after I got married ’03, I have a limited time and I have a lot of things to do except art. Well, I don’t know what is next. Just try to keep doing it, then I will see what happens next. What is satisfaction? That I am learning now and feels like a long way to go, never feel satisfied is my disease. Now I have to learn from within and put into art. I remember when I first did painting, I painted with my true feeling and felt free. But now, I have a lot of considerations/fear in somehow. With the prior of learning of commercial art/illustration, I learned to be pushed to better ideas, compositions, colors and better proportion. I feel like I was trapped by those limitations which cease my creativity. Is that true? I don’t know. I feel like I put the blame to those skills I got to put use of a greater art. So today I don’t know the answer of the statement of Creativity VS Satisfaction.

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